The Kidney Sale!

After my disastrous introduction to the swarm of Nursing recruitment agencies out there, the lady at Recruitment Panda is my new best friend.  

Don’t get me wrong, I haven’t suddenly gone soft in the head and I’m not going to be pushed into doing something I don’t feel comfortable with, but her regular calls to update me on different opportunities or simply to explain what avenues she’s exploring on my behalf are like a breath of fresh air. 

She’s come up with a couple of possible matches for full time nursing roles for me but explained that the homes were recently out of embargoes after getting in a pickle. She said she wanted me to know as much about the homes as possible so that there were no surprises and I was able to make fully informed choices. 

I told her I didn’t think I was confident enough to go into those sorts of homes and she understood – told me she wanted to let me know what was out there, but was glad that I would wait for something that was more me. 

When I asked her (in a moment of cynicism) why she still called when she wasn’t getting anything out of it, she told me that she wanted to keep me fully up to date with my job search. She also said that it helps her to get to know me better, understanding my values and finding out what’s really important to me – that way she’ll be able to find the right position for me without wasting my time on jobs that aren’t suitable. 

I kind of want to ask her if she can find me a nice boyfriend too but that might be taking it too far! 

After our first call, she took all of the information from our conversation and helped me write a brilliant CV. She’d managed to put into words all of the skills and knowledge I had acquired and blended them with ‘the real me’ – my values, my personality and my true strengths. It even gave a clear indication of my past experience and where I want my nursing career to go in the future. I reckon even Smug Sue’s CV isn’t as good as mine now!

I’ve done a few agency shifts this week and I’m a bit knackered. Somehow, I ended up at the home where I’d gone for the deputy manager interview but thankfully, the owner wasn’t there to meet me with his grimy socks and even grimier fungal nail infection. 

Unfortunately, the cast and crew of Jeremy Kyle were my support team for the day and it was an uphill battle all the way. Everything I asked them to do they challenged and anything I asked them not to do they ignored. The ringleader in this bunch of clowns told me during handover that she gave the orders and if I knew what was good for me I’d do as she said. 

Ten months ago my bowels would have turned to jelly and I would have quivered and quaked at the underlying threat. This time I rolled my eyes in a way that let her know that I’m not playing the ‘my balls are bigger than your balls’ game.  I let her know that as long as the residents were receiving their care and receiving it in a kind and compassionate way, then that was all that mattered. 

I’ve been trying to work out what’s made me feel so chilled about everything. I think it’s because I don’t have to do this if I don’t want to. I know that I’ve been considering this whole permanent job malarkey, but there’s a real sense of freedom in knowing that I can leave whenever I want and that none of these homes actually ‘own’ me. 

Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t walk out in the middle of a shift. Not only do I not want to be referred to the NMC, on a personal level I just would not do that. 

But with this realisation of freedom and control, I must have been feeling quite magnanimous as I decided to call that first recruitment agency back and apologise for not turning up at the interview last week and ignoring their 142 calls since. 

I was actually going to give them some feedback as well as to why the deputy’s job wasn’t for me but I didn’t get that far. 
Talking of clowns, the supercilious ‘recruitment adviser’ who I’m sure was about 12 years old, actually tried to tell me off! She told me that I had a poor attitude and clearly lacked a strong work ethos. She said that I had brought the reputation of Shoe Horn Healthcare Staff (or whatever they're called) into disrepute and that I should feel ashamed of myself. She then told me that she was prepared to give me one last chance and that she had the perfect job for me. 

I nearly choked! She then added that I owed it to her personally to attend the interview and to accept the job if it was offered to me. WTF! 

I was fuming. With as calm a voice as I could muster, I asked her at what point she had donated one of her kidneys to me, as that would be the only saintly act of giving that would require this level of payback. 

She asked me if I knew who I was speaking to and told me she didn’t like my tone. I told her I was fully aware of the trumped up little fart that I was talking to and that I didn’t like her or anything she stood for. I then triumphantly told her where she could stick her kidney. And her job offer. 

Just as I was slamming the phone down, my consultant from Recruitment Panda rang. It’s like she’s got this sixth sense tuned directly into my feelings. I’m getting a bit worried that every time she rings though I’m like a raging bull. She must think that I’m a prime candidate for anger management classes and I jokingly suggested that I block book a course. She paused before she responded and said she thought that my expression of emotion was because I am passionate about what I do and because I want to do the right thing for the right reasons. 

I’d never thought of it like that before but I do believe she’s right. So many kinds of people make me cross but none more than those who think they know what’s best for me without knowing anything about me! 

That’s what I like so much about Recruitment Panda. They’re interested in me as a person. They don’t want to match me up with a job I’m going to hate or that I can’t do. What would be the point of that? Instead, they support me both professionally and personally and I have figured out that they too are passionate about what they do, because they want to do the right thing for the right reason too. 

If they owned a care home, I’d be knocking the door down begging for a job with them! 

I haven’t got a new position yet, but to be honest, I’m not bothered. I’ve told my consultant that I’d like to leave it for a while, as I’m actually enjoying the freedom of my agency role and still learning new skills. I want to be the best nurse I can possibly be before I take a permanent role. I’m also happy to wait for the right job to be found without having to trade in my organs! 

My consultant told me I was very sensible and that she would keep in touch and would keep her eyes open for any jobs that clearly had ‘Florence’ stamped all over it! I’m so glad she took the time to approach me; I’ve spent hours talking to her over the last few weeks and she has really helped me to regain my confidence in myself. 

I’m amazed at how thorough she has been when trying to find me the right role; and guess what!? She loves toffee crisps and Donner Kebabs just like me!